Sometimes I miss blogging and writing all those things (more toward craps).. but sometimes, I just wanna end this because im not talented in writing.
I have been in this bubble for a long time where I have my insecurity wrapper and lots of weaknesses. I keep looking at other people with jealousy and hatred. It stem from my low confidence. well Im always in the situation which I think unfair. I work as twice as hard but why other people get to reap the rewards too?
Today, I have plenty of free times. Looking back into the past is always my favorite. Back to the time when I actually have a cheerful live (padahal tuan dia penuh dengan depression) and enjoy all the things. I did lots of things from adoring my crush until picking fight with the teachers. Well living at boarding school is quite fun even if im not active. hehe
Today I found myself are looking more towards the future and the present. To be honest.. this 2017, I got the roommate I've always dream off. I can't ask for more (Shes totally like I ask God for, OMG....), My lecturers are cool and my research supervisor is like a mom. My research team is awesome (even if there is some bickering here and there..small talks). I only have one sem left before finishing this, hehehehehe and if I can find a job as soon as I finish my study, then getting married in 2019 is possible. ye lah, im getting old. Right now already 24, is not time for heartbreak pastu waste my time nak cari yg betul2 serius lagi sekali.. penatlah. In addition, I want to go for driver license, the auto one only lah because Melor is a coward girl so kenot try manual at all. adehh but its okay, at least I still wanna try to drive auto car later on. haha xdelah laki asyik kena hantar g mana-mana kan.. and I think that's all what I enjoy and expect.
I don't know if you ccan understand this post but.. I'm happy.
The present are looking pretty.
The future are promising.
I'm looking forward to wake up in the morning
I enjoy my day as it is - alone or with someone
I enjoy my weekend like a teenage girl
I buy make up and I use em for real and not scared to come out with sinchan eyebrow. kahkahkah
I read my books and study my test.
My night always peaceful.
Saya rasa cukup.
Segalanya cukup-- and I stop longing for more. and I stop feeling jealous for others.
God is fair, human isnt. for what this hatred and jealousy, it makes me feel exhausted -- to pretend how nice I am. So I decide to stop and I feel content.
p/s: I already get an internship offers. hehehehehehhe it's actually 2 out of 5 but I already choose my place.
